Cleaning out some old electronic components can bring about a few surprises. The number of HDMI cables one has can be excessive, and discovering more than one usb micro-b cables brings thought to why the fuck do I have ANY usb micro-b cables. But it turns out there also was an old hard drive that needed a usb micro-b cable to operate, and it had 1TB of data in 3 folders. “Live Music” was one of them, and this folder was filled with, you guessed it, live music. With live shows being so missed during the pandemic, it was a fun dive into some moments captured in history.

As far as the recordings go, there is a spectrum of sound quality you can find. If you can find a soundboard recording (SBD) 99.9% of the time the quality will be top notch. Listening to soundboards of classic bands almost serves as an audible time travel. Even more fun is discovering rare performances of songs or tweaks/remixes that are only played while on tour. If you’ve never been to a Khruangbin show, they play a sick medley that covers everything from Sade and Toni Braxton to Dr. Dre, Rick James, and Chris Isaak in sultry and funky fashion. Do us a favor, take a few minutes out of your day and give this a listen…. Khruangbin - Hip Hop Medley (2018-11-28 – Chicago, IL)

So much fun. Just as fun is when all of these collide with your favorite band. On July 15th, 1998 TOOL performed in Kalamazoo, MI off the sound of their 1996 release “Aenima”. On the album there’s a track called “Pushit”, a 9 minute song that lyrically is about an abusive relationship (either with the self or with another) while the band plays through a variety of movements, each complementing the song’s story. The song holds a very unique status in TOOLs catalog for a few reasons.

First is the song itself. Lyrics such as, “I’m alive when you’re touching me, alive when you’re shoving me down. But I’d trade it all for just a little piece of mind”, bring to light views that the singer has on this relationship. It is a very emotionally driven track with the band doing well to capture the chaos of these emotions in sound. The swells and drops in volume only to slowly build again to multiple climaxes is a display of the care to which TOOL compose their music. Every change in time, tempo, and every note played is purposely done to accentuate the narrative and emotions by the vocalist. After a victorious shout of “Never want to see that place again!”, the band plays into a monsterous movement to champion this change led by the lyricist. This time the gap comes back around but instead of staying, the lyricist has been empowered to escape, in a perhaps violent fashion. But it’s also an example of TOOL composing at a very high level. The purposeful and conscious compositions allow the bandmates to express their mastery of their instruments while also using them as “tool”s to allow vocalist Maynard Keenan to process whatever emotions he’s processing through the song. The sounds carry emotion and take the listener for a ride that demands your attention.

So on this particular night in Kalamazoo, MI the band decided to debut a completely different sound for the song. Opening with a plea for vulnerability the band took the song to a softer place and put a whole new twist on the sound and song. The story remains the same, but subtle changes in lyrical structure and composition present the listener with a new perspective on the relationship in the story. The song starts off with a much softer sound. Maynards voice is much more vulnerable, and is expressed as a soft cry for help. You can almost hear him tremble as he sings, “I will choke until I swallow, choke this infant here before me…..”. The subtle shift in how “You still love me” becomes “You steal of me” back to "You still love me" show how abusive the relationship is for the vocalist. Then there is a build that begins with a gnarly bass line that introduces the theme of “somewhere I don’t to be”. It sounds almost as if the vocalist is washing himself clean of whatever it is that is bothering him and that audible theme of championing the change starts here and leads in the masterfully sung climax of the song. The last 3 minutes are an epic ride. Maynard’s vocals are at his best throughout the end of the song. “If when I say I may fade like a sight if I stay, You minimize my movement any way”. and “There’s no love in fear" all while drummer Danny Carey puts on a masterclass of cymbal play. His use of the high-hat pedal cuts in a way that makes it sound almost weapon like, while Maynard sings, “Remember I’ll always love you as I claw your fucking throat away. It’ll end no other way” The power with which Carey hits each cymbal seem to express the battle going on in the song. Just a beautiful reimagining of the song. And this particular version of the song was played lived a total of maybe only 4 times, one of them was on this night in October 1998. A beautiful example of a band using the sound to change the emotional landscape of a song.

Then there’s the performance of “Pushit” from July 9, 1998. One of TOOL’s strengths as a band is their live performances. Going to a live TOOL show is like a being in an immersive art experience. The addition of visuals (guitarist Adam Jones creates most of the art used on the live shows), lights, lasers, rotatinging screens, pentagrams, smoke and maybe some mirrors, all have a purpose and adds another layer to their shows). But before then, it was a literal art show for the band. Singer MJK would dress in drag, body paint, and costumes at random and implement these characters into the show. One of my favorites is the “Reverend Maynard” character who dressed in a suit, carried the bible, and PREACHED. It is just incredible entertainment. On certain nights Keenan would dress in drag and perform the entire show that way. Taking into account the context of the song, having previously asked for people to find a vulnerable spot only to go ahead and present that on the live performance leads to an epic rare performance of a masterful song. If you have some time, watch the whole performance. It’s incredible.

Wildly enough, this song is also holds lore for the events of the 1997 performance of Pushit. While performing “Pushit in London a fan ran on stage to hug singer Maynard James Keenan, only for Keenan to flip the fan over and hold him down in a reverse choke hold while finishing the performance. He literally sits on this guy and finishes the performance while security guards kick someone else off stage. It all leads to a very disturbing image of Maynard singing the ending of the song to the disturbed fan on stage. Such an odd moment, but still an epic performance by the band.

All this to say, come back concerts. We miss you.